You
are well aware of the power of your emotions. You probably also understand how
sometimes they can seem out of control and unmanageable. If you'd like to
achieve emotional balance, greater control over your emotions and better health
the following information will prove invaluable.
There
are certain skills to managing emotions. These include:
Definition:
defining the emotion in your own terms and from your own understanding.
Distance: it
is important to gain some distance from your emotions. This will help you gain
clearer understanding of your feelings and how they are impacting you. When you
are in the middle of the situation dealing with the emotions in the here and
now everything will seem muddled and you will struggle to see what is happening
as well as the bigger picture.
Release: by
understanding and recognising the emotion as well as achieving distance you
will be able to begin releasing the negativity surrounding it.
Focus:
through focus on the emotions and the attendant triggers, feelings and
behaviors you can gain clarity and create change.
Regrouping:
by following through the previous skills you will be able to regroup your
thoughts, feelings and attitudes. Creating a new set of behaviors when dealing
with difficult situations will help you to cope will help you to cope in the
future.
Maintenance:
like all habits practice makes perfect and you will need to constantly remind
yourself of the positive changes you have made with regard to your emotions and
their impact on your life. What will you do to remind yourself how to remain
positive, calm and balanced?
Writing
can help you to achieve emotional balance as it will take you through all the
skills above.
How
does it work?
If
you are suffering from an emotion such as sorrow then everything you think,
feel and do will be tainted by it. It will have a negative effect on you and
your actions. No one wants to live in sorrow for long.
By
taking a piece of paper and a pen you can write yourself into a more
emotionally balanced state.
Start
by writing a really happy memory of a time when you were not experiencing any
sorrow or any other negative emotions. Make your writing really descriptive so
that you can see the scene clearly, make it colorful, add sounds, smells and
things you can touch as well as taste. Write down how you felt and why you felt
so positive and happy. Try and include the following:
When?
Where?
What?
Who?
How?
Why?
This
positive memory will become an anchor. You can display it somewhere prominent
or keep it safely hidden for use when needed. It is designed for use when you
are feeling anxious, stressed, sorrowful, angry or any other negative emotion.
If you have a bad day you can refer to it and be reminded of a happier positive
time.
Next,
follow each step from defining the negative emotion you are feeling to
maintenance. Again include the when, where, what, who, how and why as this will
really help you understand the emotion as well as any triggers and resulting
behaviors.
By writing your thoughts and feelings at each stage, as well as identifying the triggers, you can not only understand the emotion better but yourself and your reaction to it. By having this written insight into yourself you are learning how to take control of your emotions and achieve balance. You will be able to refer to it to remind yourself how to cope with difficult situations or simply how much you've achieved and grown.
